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2017 Champneys Belgian Grand Prix

MBKF1MBKF1 Member Moderator
The summer break is nearly over, but before the drivers return to racing in Belgium, they will spend a weekend at a luxury Spa, relaxing with various motor racing themed treatments.

The source of the treatments involves the drivers having various pins being stuck into their hairs, in a form of hair related acupuncture. They then move onto the sauna, which will calm the drivers after taking their red water baths to soothe the pain of the previous treatment. They then walk straight to the next set of rooms, where their recently pinned hairs will be combed and given a new fresh style.

After leaving the Combing Room, the drivers will proceed to the Shore View room, where they can take a poo hon the toilet if necessary, with drivers this year able to empty their bowel at nearly full pace, and at over 300 kph.

After the drivers have relieved themselves, their faecal matter will be collected to form a marshland fen, cos why not, and they can go back to the next treatment, which involves being stabbed a lot. Then if the treatment over runs slightly, they'll have to make the long run back to the Bus Stop to catch the last bus home.

Forgive me, this is terrible.
MBKF1 | Community Moderator | Please be aware that I don't do much actual moderating

Comments

  • JiggyJiggy Member Race Steward
    I applaud this.

    I definitely applaud this.
  • GoldenColtGoldenColt Member Team Principal
    What the f did I just read?

    .......................

  • HughesyHughesy Member Champion
    @MBKF1 The relaxing Spa treatment obviously didn't work for Alonso.
  • LukedfrtLukedfrt Member Race Steward
    Honda can go and **** themselves.                           
    BCFC - KEEP RIGHT ON!!! 
    The best ever - Alonso #14
  • HughesyHughesy Member Champion
    Force India need to sort this out, it's ridiculous, I thought Hamilton Rosberg didn't get on, but this is a new level. Bang out of order what Perez did, without money I'd get rid of him for the good of the team.
  • MBKF1MBKF1 Member Moderator
    Class acts from Hamilton and Vettel today, once again showing why they're the 2 championship protagonists. They made their team mates look very average today. Mercedes will surely have to start throwing everything behind Hamilton now.

    And also, there's many frustrated drivers today. Verstappen and Alonso being let down, yet again, by their equipment, and Ocon being rammed into the wall by his team mate.

    If Verstappen has 1 or 2 more failures during these final few races, he'll be out of Red Bull within the next year or two I'm sure. And now I'm 100% convinced Alonso will only stay at McLaren if they ditch Honda.

    And what about Force India, what do they do to keep their drivers happy? I can't believe the most fractious relationship on the whole grid is between 2 team mates fighting for the lower points. Never would've expected that pre-season.

    How this all affects the driver market for the next 2 years I would love to know.
    MBKF1 | Community Moderator | Please be aware that I don't do much actual moderating
  • JiggyJiggy Member Race Steward
    Well, especially Max has no place to go, so the tough talk from him and Jos in post-race interviews is cool and all, but I don't think he'll be impressing Red Bull with it.

    Alonso is basically going out of his way to take a heaving **** on everything Honda. It's hilarious. It's just him talking a massive amount of **** and McLaren takes it like a **** because he's the only elite driver they could realistically sign.
  • WynterdustWynterdust Member Team Principal
    Ocon's front wheel wasn't even level with Perez's rear wheel before the wall so why was Perez wrong for following the racing line? Ocon should have backed off slightly and waited for the end of Kemmel straight like most drivers would have. He was driving into an always closing gap that wasn't a realistic overtaking place. He would have had to back off at Eau Rouge anyway and lost more time so what was the point other than trying to prove one?
    Basically what Ocon wanted was for Perez to move over and let him pass. Obviously in a rush since he was upset about rejoining behind Perez after his pit stop.
    Definitely more Ocon's fault.

    T- "I don't consider you my enemy."

    K- "Oh? I didn't consider you at all."

    T- "Now that's just hurtful..."

  • HughesyHughesy Member Champion
    1: That wasn't the racing line, as can be seen from the car in front


    2: He had enough of his car along side for Perez to know he was there, and for teammates you need to give each other room.
     Perez knew exactly what he was doing, Force India said themselves it was his fault, so I'm not sure where you are coming from.


  • AMS97KRRAMS97KRR Member Petrol Head
    Perez is desperate not to be shown up by a new kid and he's making himself look moronic. I can't understand why you'd try and put another driver in the barrier like that.


    | 2016 CM Forum Predictor Game Champion! |
    | Manchester United |  Sebastian Vettel #5 | Kimi Raikkonen #7 |
     



  • GoldenColtGoldenColt Member Team Principal
    I don't see how you can blame Perez exclusively for any of the two incidents. On the first lap he was sandwiched between Nico Hülkenberg on his inside and Ocon going for a move that was always going to end in tears. Three wide into Eau Rouge? With these wider cars? Forget it.

    Regarding the second incident, I would lay most of the blame at Sergio's door, but even then Ocon went for an overly optimistic move which he could and should've backed out of. There was a long DRS-straight just ahead, waiting to be used in order to get past Perez. Why he had to do it in Eau Rouge is beyond me. Did he want to show off a bit and humiliate his teammate? Well, that didn't go well.

  • MBKF1MBKF1 Member Moderator
    Ocon could have backed out, but at the end of the day, he was entitled to some space. The rules say...
    If any part of the front wing of the car attempting to pass is alongside the rear wheel of the car in front this will be deemed to be a 'significant portion'.
    So yeah, definitely Perez at fault for not leaving him any space.
    MBKF1 | Community Moderator | Please be aware that I don't do much actual moderating
  • AMS97KRRAMS97KRR Member Petrol Head
    edited August 28
    I don't see how you can blame Perez exclusively for any of the two incidents. On the first lap he was sandwiched between Nico Hülkenberg on his inside and Ocon going for a move that was always going to end in tears. Three wide into Eau Rouge? With these wider cars? Forget it.

    Regarding the second incident, I would lay most of the blame at Sergio's door, but even then Ocon went for an overly optimistic move which he could and should've backed out of. There was a long DRS-straight just ahead, waiting to be used in order to get past Perez. Why he had to do it in Eau Rouge is beyond me. Did he want to show off a bit and humiliate his teammate? Well, that didn't go well.
    Perez has actually taken the blame for the first one, it's not as bad as the second one and for sure they both could have done more. 

    The reason the second one is so stupid is mostly that it was his own team mate he tried to force into the wall. Perez might think it's a stupid move (And to be honest I partly agree) but Ocon still has the right to try it, because that's how racing is. We do see passes at Eau Rouge, and that's also the type of thing people love to see. It's a ballsy move, which is what F1 needs. Perez has no respect for Ocon, he was only thinking of himself in that scenario, he isn't a team player. He cost the team an easy podium in Canada as well by refusing to concede to Ocon. 

    I suspect any chance of a Ferrari seat is disappearing rapidly, if it hasn't already. They don't hire people for that supporting role who refuse to play for the team.

    | 2016 CM Forum Predictor Game Champion! |
    | Manchester United |  Sebastian Vettel #5 | Kimi Raikkonen #7 |
     



  • WynterdustWynterdust Member Team Principal
    Hughesy said:
    1: That wasn't the racing line, as can be seen from the car in front


    2: He had enough of his car along side for Perez to know he was there, and for teammates you need to give each other room.
     Perez knew exactly what he was doing, Force India said themselves it was his fault, so I'm not sure where you are coming from.

    The line Perez was going to take was obvious and Ocon still went for the ever closing gap knowing full well there was a wall there. He should have waited until the realistic overtaking oppurtunity instead of trying to squeeze through.
    Perez shouldn't be obliged to just open the door because Ocon's trying to be overly ambitious.
    The fact that Perez wasn't penalised for the incident is another sign he wasn't completely at fault.

    Perez could have left room. Ocon shouldn't have put his car there. Both could have avoided it but I think Ocon's more at fault as he could have easily waited until the end of the straight.

    T- "I don't consider you my enemy."

    K- "Oh? I didn't consider you at all."

    T- "Now that's just hurtful..."

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