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2017 OVO Canadian Grand Prix / 2017 Grand Poutine du Canada

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Greetings.

We've reached that time of the year where Formula One has landed on American soil. North American-soil. Because luckily for Sergio Perez, we are not in the United States of America, but in Canada. Home of maple leafs, Drake, ice hockey, Drake, maple syrup, Drake, mounties, unconditional hospitality, Aubrey Graham, Degrassi, poutine, countless American refugees who are sick of their own country, a probably unhealthy fascination with professional wrestling, the 6ix, Freddie Ljungberg's alias known as Jacques Villeneuve and Drake. And it's a hometown-race for Canada's very own Lance Stroll! And seeing how the last hometown boy in Jacques Villeneuve drove like even a bigger nutjob as usual every time we've reached Montreal.....Well, I'm sure everything will go alright.

What it does not have is BACON. CANADA DOES NOT HAVE BACON. THEIR BACON SUCKS. THEIR BACON CAN GO F-

Bacon is overrated guys.

The Grand Prix du Canada almost was over before it even got started with Lewis Hamilton having trouble getting over the disappointment that Montreal is not a smaller part of Toronto, the only city that matters in Canada. I feel his pain. Why won't we do a race in Toronto? Post-race podium-interview held by the 6ix god himself, Drake, oh man, oh man.

Anyway, despite what Barney Stinson told you, Canada is awesome. Montreal usually is awesome. And despite the fact that I find it weird that a bunch of faux-Frenchies are singing God Save The Queen during its anthem, the race at the Circuit Gilles Villeneuve usually is awesome too. So expect people to screw up. That Wall of Champions is probably going to get rammed so hard, the people of Montreal will mistake it for Vince McMahon's nose after he screwed Bret Hart at the Montreal Screwjob in 1997. Who will be screwed at Montreal in 2017 though is most likely, definitely, without a doubt, Fernando Alonso. Imagine being that talented and having to deal with McLaren-Honda's screwups.

Talk about screw-ups, meet Lance Stroll. He's young, he's rich, but he's young, but still people expected much more. Canada is the perfect place to find great success in smashing into lots of cars, so watch this space. They actually speak French in Montreal. So here's the French translation from a special guest writer, a true French-Canadian.





Bonjour.


Salut.

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Kevin Owens new attire...

This is one circuit I'd love to go to, my uncle actually lives in Montreal as well.

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Herberts paddock people was actually (kind of) interesting for once.

https://twitter.com/therealhughesy/status/873246762731020288

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The Mclaren can't even reach 200mph down the back straight, that is dreadful....

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What a lap!! Three seriously brilliant laps by HAM, VET, and BOT.

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What a lap from Hamilton, WOW! Back to his best, just WOW.

That gesture from the Senna family was amazing, had tear (or dust) in my eye.

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Bloody hell, Lewis really showed them all who's boss today. What a stonker!

And yes, I nearly teared up too, what a brilliant surprise! Loved the shot of him hugging it on the way back, amazing.

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Lewis definitely deserves it and it's good to see that the family of Senna recognizes Hamilton's admiration of Ayrton by gifting him a race-worn helmet. That's probably just about the greatest honor he can get. Maybe even the greatest honor anyone can get. Also a fantastic tv-moment, I quite like the new F1.

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Crazy Max p2, Bottas almost hit Hamilton which would have caused a riot :joy: Stroll is going to beat Massa.

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So they could give Hamilton a chance B) I think Vettel opted to stay out though.

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Vettel had a broken wing from lap one... so Ferrari wait until after the safety car to pit and fix it? Why? 
Because another part didn't fall off until right at the restart.


Also, lads, Stroll is 11th.

And is about to be 10th, because Kvyat has a drive-through.

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Ferrari have clearly sent a team member out to the bridge and had him drop his cap onto the track in an attempt to bring out a full safety car to help Vettel ;)

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Jiggy said:
Vettel had a broken wing from lap one... so Ferrari wait until after the safety car to pit and fix it? Why? 
Because another part didn't fall off until right at the restart.


Also, lads, Stroll is 11th.

And is about to be 10th, because Kvyat has a drive-through.
That's the piece that was broken from Max cutting across at turn one. You could see it flopping before the safety car was called. It clearly needed to be changed before anything flew off at the restart. 

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Force India set up Ocon to be able to make a charge at the podium... yet can't convince Perez to move aside. Now they risk getting overtaken by Ferrari. Should be good last few laps for the podium 

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Stroll scored a point, you know what that means


Hamilton bossed that, nobody could touch him.

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If Vettel wasn't so hyped after his Ocon overtake where he spent the next few laps auditioning for Tokyo Drift, he could've got on the podium.

But still, it was pretty hype. Championship defining moves, even so Lewis has been gifted some points back after his underwhelming weekend in Monaco. 

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Given that Verstappen retired, Kimi ran into issues and Perez decided to be d ick of the day, Vettel has been gifted quite a few points aswell today. ;)

Hamilton on a different planet to the rest of the grid this weekend, and another Grand Chelem. Happy days.

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Given that Verstappen retired, Kimi ran into issues and Perez decided to be d ick of the day, Vettel has been gifted quite a few points aswell today. ;)
All Vettel was gifted today was a swipe at his front wing in turn 1. Without that all of those circumstances would've been irrelevant.

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VetteIfan said:
Given that Verstappen retired, Kimi ran into issues and Perez decided to be d ick of the day, Vettel has been gifted quite a few points aswell today. ;)
All Vettel was gifted today was a swipe at his front wing in turn 1. Without that all of those circumstances would've been irrelevant.

But that's racing. With how tight T1 is, sometimes these things do happen. Also, he could've avoided this with a better start. It's p4 when it might have been P7 or P6, not too unlucky imo.

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VetteIfan said:
Given that Verstappen retired, Kimi ran into issues and Perez decided to be d ick of the day, Vettel has been gifted quite a few points aswell today. ;)
All Vettel was gifted today was a swipe at his front wing in turn 1. Without that all of those circumstances would've been irrelevant.

But that's racing. With how tight T1 is, sometimes these things do happen. Also, he could've avoided this with a better start. It's p4 when it might have been P7 or P6, not too unlucky imo.
Or it's P4 when it might have been P1 or P2 had he not needed a new wing  >:)

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